Can your body make you sin?
Recently, I brought up a touchy topic with Logan. He kept saying, “I don’t understand why this matters. Why do you want to talk about this?” But I very adamantly kept the conversation cruising along until it all came to a head and we were in a full fledged fight. It felt like such an important issue to me, though, so I wasn’t concerned about the collateral damage in our relationship.
Afterward, once we’d kind of figured it out and smoothed things over, I left the room to get ready for bed. And that’s when I noticed that I’d just started my period.
Several weeks ago I mentioned in an Instagram post that I’ve been rattled by the intensity of my mood swings. They are noticeably hormone related and this night in particular the source of my emotional outburst was obvious. And I wept at the sight of my poor husband, the obvious victim of my sin.
To be honest, there have been times when I’ve felt angry at God concerning this issue. After all, it’s biological…my emotions can’t be helped and yet I’m held responsible for my response to them. Sometimes it feels like it’s impossible to resist them. Literally impossible.
I’ve wondered if this is what men feel like when it comes to lust. Do you think they feel like it’s unfair that day after day their body propels them toward sin? Do they feel helpless in the face of it? Do they feel indignant when people come down on them so hard for something that is chemical, biological, and instinctive?
In the midst of this battle, I think of Paul, crying out ::
What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body that is subject to death? Thanks be to God, who delivers me through Jesus Christ our Lord!
And that’s the answer. God delivers me through Jesus Christ. It’s like I keep forgetting that I’m not saved by being a good person. But I am saved by a good person. The only good one, in fact. So even if my very body drags me down towards the pit of hell, Jesus grabs me by the hand and rescues me, day after day after day.
(Art by Masaccio)